*Dread standing up for the first 24 hours post-birth
*Have nurses bring you ice cream in the middle of the night
*Wear white fishnet underwear
*Hang out in a hospital gown for days on end and no one question your fashion choice
*Request Ice-packs for your "hinterland" made out of baby diapers
*Order from "room service" for every meal and get chocolate pudding for breakfast
*Have all kinds of people see your girl parts
*Take 20 minutes to "repack" the goods after using the restroom with steps including the aforementioned fishnet underwear, maxipads the size of Minnesota, some strange pain-relieving spray, and funky smelling Tucks-ish looking pads.
*Have random nurses and lactation consultants touch and grab your goods and shove them into your newborn child's mouth
*Get frequent massages ----- of your belly to gush out all the extra fluid
*Send the babies to the nursery overnight and get your first 6 hours of solid sleep in a very long time
No comments:
Post a Comment